ABS anti bloggier system...

my dearest

i never wanted to bring you discomfort or despair. i'm awfully sorry if i couldn't make myself understood as i hoped i would.it's not that i don't understand you at all. i see your point and i try to figure out what it means to me, but you see, its not as easy as i thought it would be. i've never been in a situation like that before. i mean, i've never loved like that before... and, well about being "extreme"... its not that you are extreme... well how should i say... hmm. i couldn't explain what i felt, when i last contributed to our blog, so i put this word in quotation marks ... and the thing is i still don't know how to say it in a better way... please give me some time.it's not that we don't have enough of it, right? you were right when you said that you have a different way of dealing with pain (and how could i pressume to say that you are wrong when it concerns your feelings). and that's exactly what i wanted to say in my last entry. that we are different and you handle things differently, compared to my way. you see, i never wanted to give you pain.
every time i told you that i love you, i really meant and felt it. it' such an amazing feeling and i thank you so much for letting me feel it. no, for making me feel it!

as i said before, please give me time to get accustomed to this situation of loving you and not being able to be with you all the time. you see it's all new to me...

at the moment i'm all sixes and sevens, due to my sickness (dear, it's my tonsils again!) and your being so far and you having left only three days ago, with all my tautness slowly going away. as i told you before, it was quite exertive for me to have you here (which does not mean that i didn't enjoy it, it was great and wonderful having you here!) because i wanted to make everything perfect for you, which is never completely possible. but still i tried. and it was your first time here in sa. at. so i wanted to give you the best impression.. at any rate, thanks for your compliment. yes, it may sound strange to a.. well a stranger, but i took it as a compliment and can only say "likewise" in return. you make me more human in ways of thinking in more generous terms and seeing things in a wider sense... to put it bluntly, you give my mind scope!

was it jerry maquire who said: "you complete me" ?
well, it's not that you complete me, but you make a bit more me out of me! does that make sense for you?
thank you too!

punktal

blocked blog

Dear Pünktchen,

it's a bit discomforting to read such a post from you, but only a bit. In a way it's a logical thing that you (don't) understand me like that. The only problem is: I can't make myself understood. When I was talking about falling in love every day i assumed a general (oh how technical it sounds) love basis on which to build on, but as the German "Kleine Geschenke erhalten die Freundschaft" suggests, there has to be room for surprises and special love-makers, if you know what I'm talking about ;-) Furthermore, I don't think I'm extreme but only have a different way of dealing with pain which is ok, i guess.
Concerning our closeness: I mean it's clear that one needs some time to love again, but on the other hand just think about the special situation we were in. And it's good to know that it can work, isn't it? At least for me it is like that! I love you, and I tell everyone about it. And I like the way you make me more human, as strange as it sounds. Just take it as a compliment!

Kiss and miss you!

Äntn

blog philosophy... blog love... blog blog...

dear anton

kept thinking about your last entry... why are we human beings like that? well to be honest, i dont know. but i know that not all of us are like that, or lets say "extreme" like that... but thats one of the differences that makes us attractive for each other... anyway, we know that we are different, so lets come to the point: you told me once, or maybe even twice that you are one of that kind who have to fall in love with this one person everyday. i know now that you are like that, but i still dont see why. but this shouldnt be a problem, right? its just that it still irritates me a bit.
at any rate, you are right. i felt as close to you as i could feel, but only during the last days when you were here with me. it was quite hard to get through to you in the first week. but somehow during our walk in at. something changed and wohoop... the matthias i fell in love with in norwich. and the matthias i still love... or love again...

well and we are back in norwich. hey, you were right its all about england....

anyway...

I STILL LOVE YOU MORE THAN I EVER LOVED SOMEBODY ELSE!!!

pünktchen

Questions of trust and lust

Although this blog seems to be a mere remnant of Norwich times, it is still worth updating it from time to time, be it for reasons of amusement or for reasons of affection and love, and devotion and so on. It's interesting how people can change over the course of only two weeks: before, I wasn't sure whether I'd love the girl so much that it is worth maintaining a long-distance relationship with her, but at the same time I knew in advance how I'd feel afterwards and I got the confirmation.
Why oh why are human beings like that? Why can't we just fall for a person and stay like that? As for me, my dear dots, I must admit that I felt a never-before closeness to you. It's really a shame that I can't have this feeling here with me, in my heart, while I am working in Münster. That's just something I wanted you to know...

Yours passionately,

Anton